This post was first published on Mommy’s Weird July 30th, 2011.

 

My sister says that I have to quit talking about my sex life.

In my defense, I  keep talking about it because I am hoping that I am going to find someone else who is in the same boat. And that search is not going well.

Sailing by myself in an ocean of Slutty Mom’s.

Here’s what happened….

Scene: Whirlwinds Gymnastics Class

The topic of sex comes up. Probably because I bring it up because I am obsessed with the fact that I seem to be the only wife in this god damned town who is too tired and lazy to get naked.

Mommy #1 (who has a 3 year old and a 4 month old) tells me that “they”  are up to 2 to 3 x a week.

I tell her that is gross.

She asks me why.

And I just say “It just is.”

Then Mommy #2, who has a 3 year old and a one year old and apparently a very horny husband, states that “they” have sex everyday

Immediately and with no filter I cringe and whimper and say ‘”That’s disgusting.”

To which no one even commented.

Crickets.

Maybe a small giggle from Mommy #3.

And then I realized, they were looking at me like I HAD THE PROBLEM.

HUH WHA… .you sluts give it up 5x a week to your faithful husbands. How can I be the one with the problem?

SO maybe I do have a problem

But don’t you think sex every day of the week is a bit excessive?