Listen I know you want to read about Hot Mom’s. But before you do, you should know that I once pushed celebrity trainer Jillian Michaels in front of Super Model Tyra Banks. 

Before I start this post, I want you to know I am not fishing. I am not saying this b.c I want you to tell me I am fine just the way I am. Just listen.

Okay.

Today I took Whirlwind and Baby Bot to the park. I ended up putting my blanket beside a group of Hot Mom’s. I should’ve known better. Instantly I felt insecure. Most Mom’s know what Hot Mom’s are.  I don’t want to explain. Just think about it.  I was surrounded by beautiful people and beautiful things and beautiful babies.

At first I was jelous. Maybe feeling a little bit left out.

The right names on everything. Clothes, strollers, baby toys, teethers, breast feeding covers. I was even jelous of their receiving blankets. The fabric, the prints.

Then angry. How the HELL do these women do it?! Their hair, their ponytails, their highlights, their makeup. All perfect. Some of them were even wearing white.

White.

White skirts, white tank tops, white hats.

I don’t buy anything white.

Except rice. I just prefer it.

How did they manage to have time to straighten their hair? When did they shower?  When did they pack the kids swim suits and towels? How did they find their keys  for their vehicles to even drive to the park?

I was debating asking one of to teach me how to have it all together.

I’m a friggn’ mess. ALL THE TIME. If I am lucky I shower 3x a week.

For the record, I do hate washing my body. But, that is a whole different post for another time.

p.s I went and bought a straightner.